Not Biologically Ours, But Completely Our Son

This is Snowflake #656. He is not ours, yet he is fully and wholly ours. He is our little miracle, our Masen.

We tried to expand our family for 10 years. It started with fertility drugs, then several IUIs, then graduating to two failed IVFs. Shortly after the IVFs, I got pregnant naturally—twice within a year! Both ended in early miscarriages, with one testing to have had Down Syndrome. Sometime in the middle of this journey, we became licensed for foster care and seriously looked into adoption. We initiated the adoption process once our foster license expired, but the first organization shut down, then the second organization closed its Philippines Program (our preferred program) just as we had begun attending adoption classes and filling out the required paperwork.

Because another IVF would be out-of-pocket, I turned to other means—I religiously used a fertility monitor, got fertility acupuncture, improved my gag reflex drinking Chinese herbs, sought out chiropractic care, dabbled in fertility self-massage, yoga, and even tried an at-home IUI-type kit I discovered. We finally decided to do one more round of IVF, only to have an incomplete cycle because none of our embryos made it past day three. That’s when our doctor suggested an egg donor.

I receive Focus on the Family, a Christian magazine, but I never have time to read it. Soon after the last failed IVF cycle, for no reason at all, I casually flipped through the magazine and read about the Snowflake Embryo Adoption Program. Can you say Divine Intervention? There was no doubt—this was ALL God!

The program allows families to share their extra frozen embryos (from their own IVF cycles) with other families through adoption. These parents have completed their families through IVF but have remaining embryos. They don’t want to discard their embryos, but they also do not want these precious lives just sitting in frozen storage. Instead of just donating their embryos to their clinic, they choose to have them adopted by another family and go through a process very similar to traditional adoption. We got to have the best of both worlds—I was able to experience pregnancy and give birth to Masen, through the miracle of adoption!

Masen is not biologically ours, but is completely our son. He is an adorable Hapa Haole baby, who we thank God for every single day. He has two biological brothers who I hope he’ll want to meet one day when he gets older. He is our Snowflake, our blessing, our God-send.

While many friends and family know about our journey, there are still so many others out there who don’t know about this option. If you (or someone you know) are struggling with infertility or have frozen embryos you don’t want to discard, Snowflakes is an option!

There is a God who loves you, a God who has amazing plans for your life. Just like he had a plan for our family and Masen. He is a God of hope, restoration, forgiveness, peace, and love.

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