Annual Education Emails

The PACC sends emails annually, on your child’s birthday, containing resources for various situations or topics to be aware of with your child’s new age. If you adopted an older child, there may be resources from younger ages that would be helpful for you now from a resource sent for another age. Additionally, it can only benefit you to prepare now for a later stage in your child’s life. We want all of these resources available to you, so please take a moment to browse the topics below. You can also contact the PACC for additional information at any time.

Post Adoption Connection Center

Heather Sloan, LBSW, Director


Resources by topic

Balancing structure and nurture


Importance of play


Attachment Cycle

Book: Parenting from the Inside Out by Daniel J. Siegel and Mary Hartzell


Learning in discipline

Book: Beyond Consequences, Logic, and Control: A Love-Based Approach to Helping Attachment-Challenged Children with Severe Behaviors by Heather T. Forbes


Naming Emotions


RAD vs Trauma

Book: Wounded Children, Healing Homes by Jayne Schooler




Grief and loss


When parents don’t attach


Connecting with pre-teens


Secure attachment


Self-esteem/positive self-worth

Book: Being Adopted: The Lifelong Search for Self-  By: David M. Brodzinsky, Robin Marantz Henig


Discipline with teens

Book: Whole Brain Discipline by Dr. Daniel Seigel


Connecting with teens


Attachment with teens

Book: The 5 Love Languages of Teenagers: The Secret to Loving Teens Effectively by Gary Chapman


Voices of adult adoptees


Attachment with adult children

This section isn’t just for domestic adoption. You may not have information on your child’s international biological family but that doesn’t mean you won’t encounter many of these themes with your child as they get older and have questions about where they come from.


Telling their adoption story from birth


Your child’s difficult story

Book: Telling the Truth to your Adopted Child by Jayne Schooler




Birth Siblings


Talking about adoption


Curious and independent


Engage your child’s background


Identity development in closed adoptions


Telling your child their full story


Social media birth family interactions



Birth parent searching


Developing identity


DNA tests


Managing birth parent relationships



Thinking about adoption


Navigating openness


Birth siblings


Access to birth records

These resources are not specific to children adopted at an older age. Even if you adopted a child as an infant, we know their in utero environment and experience can also have lasting impacts on their emotional and behavioral development. Review these resources below no matter what age or location your child was adopted.


Discipline vs punishment


Impacts of trauma

Books: Attaching in Adoption: Practical Tools for Today’s Parents by Deborah Gray and Toddler Adoption: The Weaver’s Craft by Mary Hopkins-Best


Science of trauma

Book: The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog: And Other Stories from a Child’s Psychiatrist’s Notebook – What traumatized children can teach us about loss, love, and healing by Dr. Bruce Perry


Food Issues


Sexual abuse and body safety


Learning struggles


Classrooms and trauma


Healing from trauma

Book: Primal Wound by Nancy Newton Verrier



Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs)


Seeing beyond behavior


Depression and mental health


Let’s talk about sex


Substance use and trauma


Raising teenagers

Book: Parenting in the Eye of the Storm: The Adoptive Parent’s Guide to Navigating the Teen Years by Katie Naftzger

Book: Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain by Dr. Daniel J. Siegel


Mental health


Developmental milestones


Six themes for teens

Book: Beneath the Mask: For Teen Adoptees, by Debbie Riley


Find your child’s strengths

Though these resources below are listed by age, with inaccurate birthdays and developmental delays, you may encounter situations with your child that fit under a different age. Be sure to read over all these topics below for guidance with your child now and in the future.


Age 1 – Rapid brain development


Age 2 – Curious and independent


Age 3 – Communication and expectations


Age 4 – Teach correct behavior


Age 5 – Independence


Age 6 – Lifebooks


Age 7 – Control and manipulation


Age 8 – Earning independence


Age 9 – Nutrition


Age 10 – Anxiety

Book: The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk


Age 11 – Growing independence and trust


Age 12 – Building trust in independence

Book: Pieces of Me: Who Do I Want to Be? Voices for and by Adopted Teens By: Robert L. Ballard


Age 13 – Connecting with adopted peers


Book: Adopted: The Ultimate Teen Guide (It Happened to Me)


Age 14 – Launching



Age 15 – Parenting teens


Age 16 – Between childhood and adulthood


Age 17 – Balancing privacy


Age 18 – Resources for your adult child

Book: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective College Students: Succeeding in College… and in life by Stephen R. Covey

Book: Pieces of Me: Who do I Want to Be. Voices for and by adopted teens edited by Robert L. Ballard

Book: Find a Stranger, Say Goodbye by Lois Lowry

Book: Journey of the Adopted Self: A Quest for Wholeness by Betty Jean Lifton

Book: Coming Home to Self: The Adopted Child Grows Up by Nancy Newton Verrier



Sensory Processing Disorder

Books: The Out of Sync Child: Recognizing and Coping with Sensory Processing Disorder by Kranowitz and Miller and Everyday Games for Sensory Processing Disorder




Substance exposure

Book: The Mystery of Risk: Drugs, Alcohol, Pregnancy, and the Vulnerable Child by Ira J. Chasnoff, MD

Book: Damaged Angels: An Adoptive Mother’s Struggle to Understand the Tragic Toll of Alcohol in Pregnancy by Bonnie Buxton

Book: Understanding Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder: A Guide to FASD for Parents, Carers and Professionals by Maria Catterick and Liam Curran



Book: The Science of Making Friends: Helping Socially Challenged Teens and Young Adults, 2013 by Elizabeth A. Laugeson, Psy.D.


Medication and Diagnoses




Social media and internet safety


Adopted teens and dating


Adoption documents


College preparation


Building resiliency

Stages of development

Book: Black Baby White Hands: A View from the Crib by Jaiya John


Building a positive narrative

Book: Does Anybody Else Look Like Me? By Donna Jackson Nakazawa


Racism in school


Role models for racial identity

Book: Why are all the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria by Dr Beverly Tatum

Video: Beverly Daniel Tatum: Why Are All of the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria? Video recorded at Chicago Humanities Festival, June 2018


Racial role models

Book: In their Own Voices: Transracial Adoptees Tell Their Stories by Rita J Simon and Rhonda M. Roorda




Children’s books to help start conversations about race and culture:

The Keeping Quilt by Patricia Polacco

Little Miss Spider by David Kirk

The Little Snowgirl by Carollyn Croll

A Little Story About a Big Turnip by Tatiana Zunshine

A Mother for Choco by Keiko Kasra

Over the Moon by Karen Katz

Seeds of Love by Mary Ebejer Peteryl

Three Cheers for Catherine the Great! By Cari Best

Through Moon and Stars and Night Skies by Kristine Wise

I Don’t Have Your Eyes by Carrie Kitze (China adoption)

I Am Latino: The Beauty in Me by Myles and Sandra Pinkney (Latin America)

We Wanted You by Liz Rosenberg (Latin America)

Mommy’s Heart Went POP! by Christina Kyllonen and Peter Greer (Africa)

Africa Is Not A Country by Margy Burns Knight (Africa)

Mishka (2-8) by Adrienne Ehlert Bashista (Eastern Europe/Russia)

Borya and the Burps: An Eastern European Adoption Story by Joan McNamara (Eastern Europe/Russia)

When I Met You by Adrienne Ehlert Bashista (Eastern Europe/Russia)

Talk with our experts:
© 2024 Nightlight Christian Adoptions | Sitemap