As adoption professionals, a large part of our job is to soothe the frayed nerves of fathers and mothers undergoing the adoption process. The roller coaster of adoption and foster care is not for the faint of heart and regardless of how strong a parent feels he or she is, all parents buckle under the pressure, whether they are adopting internationally, domestically or from our Snowflakes embryo adoption program or providing love and support through foster care.
During my years working in adoption and foster care I have witnessed both the behaviors of adoptive mothers and fathers as well as foster parents. While society has groomed males and females to react differently to stress, both still experience the same worries and anxieties. Our fathers are generally taught to be the pillars of strength and to not show emotion. I am here to tell you though, that while they may not exhibit the same emotions as our mothers, they are still dealing with the same stressors, anxieties and with the same emotions.
One of the most cherished duties of my job is to watch adoptive parents as they are finally united with their children. This is just as an emotional experience for fathers as it is for mothers. This is the breaking point for fathers as I inevitably see happy tears streaming down the faces of fathers as well as the mothers. Just an FYI to all you fathers, it is ok to cry!
Father’s Day is June 15th this year! Fathers are so important to a child’s life and for Father’s Day, we want to thank all the fathers out there for what they do. Recognizing you for the important role you play and impact you have on your children. Thank you to our dads for being the man of steel in the family and holding it together in times of undue stress. Thank you to our dads for being the man that comforts the mothers when they are overcome with the stress of adoption or the trials and tribulations of being a foster parent. Many times, fathers step in and take over to preserve Mom’s sanity (for those of you who can relate, this happens more often than you think!). Thank you, Dad for teaching our little ones to throw a baseball, kick a soccer ball, ride a bike for the first time without training wheels, and for taking our kiddos fishing. Thank you to our dads for a shoulder to cry on for Mom and the children when the going gets rough in life. Thank you to our dads for loving our mothers and showing our children what it means to be a dad and a husband, after all it is said the best thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. Thank you, Dads for knowing our children learn more through action than through words. Most of all thank you to all our dads for being loving, caring and supportive fathers to our children.
Psalm 103:13:
"As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him".
Thank you, Dads, for showing compassion for being willing to open your hearts and homes to a child in need.
I cannot end this narrative without thanking the fathers in our own lives. Thank you to our dads for the love and support and for teaching us strength. Thank you to the uncles for being an awesome role models to our nieces and nephews. Thank you to the grandfathers for being such incredible influences in their children’s and grandchildren’s lives.
Happy Father’s Day to all of the dads in our lives, whether you are a bio father, adoptive father or father through foster care. You are such an important part of our children’s lives and all of you have touched the lives of our families in such an important way!