Inspirational Stories Of Birth Moms Putting Up A Baby For Adoption.
Giving up your baby for adoption can be a very difficult decision. We understand the tremendous amount of stress birth moms are under when dealing with this conflict. These stories are from real-life birth moms who made the tough decision to hire an adoption agency and look for parents to adopt their baby.
Real-Life Stories of Adoption
Katie’s Story Of Putting Her Child Up For Adoption
I was 27 years old with 3 children under age four. I was divorced, unemployed, and living with my parents. I was so scared and overwhelmed. I heard about Nightlight and I was put in contact with my pregnancy counselor. I thought that if I said I wanted to give up my baby for adoption that people would automatically judge me and say I was a “bad mom” for not wanting my child. To my surprise, my pregnancy counselor understood and told me what an incredible gift I could give to a family unable to have children. It never occurred to me that God could use me to help a family in a way I never dreamed possible. After our meeting, I knew that God was leading me to place my child up for adoption.
When I met the adoptive parents they hugged me. They brought me a book with pictures of them, their parents, siblings, nieces, and nephews! I took it home, studying each picture telling my baby all about his parents, his grandparents, his aunts, and uncles! The adoptive mom came with me into the delivery room. We spent the next few days in the hospital together, laughing and bonding with one another. As I was released from the hospital I was overwhelmed with so many emotions and I wondered if I had made the right choice. The next few days were hard and I cried innumerable tears. But I never second-guessed the family I had chosen for my baby. I started taking steps forward and with each passing day, I became closer to my goals. I was blessed with a job to support my family. A year later I purchased my first home, met my husband, and got married. I have come such a long way. I am still in contact with the adoptive parents. I love them and am at complete peace with every choice I made for my son.
Michelle’s Story Of Working With An Adoption Agency
Hi. My name is Michelle and I am a birth mother. I put my child up for adoption 12 years ago. I considered abortion when I first found out I was pregnant. My parents were pro-life and I didn’t really want to have an abortion but I was scared, alone, and was in a bad place. I went to a pregnancy center with my mom. It was then that I started thinking about giving up my baby for adoption. It was there I got connected with an adoption agency, Nightlight Christian Adoptions. My mom really thought adoption would be best for the baby. I had been in a bad relationship and I didn’t want anything more to do with the birth father.
Once I started thinking about putting up my child for adoption, I realized it was the best decision for me, and even more for my child so I started looking for parents to adopt my baby. I met the family about 6 months into my pregnancy, and they were great. They made the adoption process much easier because they were very comforting, nice, and always smiling. I felt comfortable with them. I would go back and forth with the decision on what to do, whether to place my son for adoption or just ‘tough it out and make things work’. But in the end, placing him for adoption was the best for me and for my son.
He’s with the family that he’s always meant to be with. He’s with the family God chose him to be with. I truly believe that. It makes it a lot easier seeing how happy they are. We’re pretty close with the adoptive family. We get pictures of him and updates over the years, and will have visits every now and then. All of these things have made it a lot easier to see how happy he really is growing up with them.
If I could speak to a birth mother, I would tell her that the different feelings that she’s probably going through are completely understandable. Feel free to talk to someone about them. I know when I first started thinking about giving up my baby for adoption, the hardest part for me was I was going back and forth thinking ‘maybe God was trying to teach me a lesson.’ But finally, I turned it around, and I knew that the real reason that I was thinking about adoption is because it was the best choice for my son. And he deserved so much more than I could have given him. And even though I would have been able to provide for him, that there was a different family out there for him. And he needed to be with them, and not with me. And that it wasn’t a punishment for me, but it was a gift for somebody else.
Emotionally, it was hard at first. There is the sad side of course, of losing a child. But I look at it more as giving somebody else the greatest gift that anybody could have given. I gave the gift of a child to a mother and father. And I gave the gift of a brother to another brother. That’s just the greatest feeling in the world. And seeing how happy he is, it makes me very proud of myself. I know that I’m a stronger person for being able to do it. It also helps that those around me were supportive and told me how proud they were of me, and how strong I was, and how they knew it was a tough decision but I was still able to do it, and how I was so selfless to be able to do the best for somebody else. That’s love.
Lesley Shares The Benefits Of Giving Her Child Up For Adoption
My name is Lesley, and I am a birth mom, which is a title that I’m able to really embrace. It is absolutely crazy to me that Jaxon will be turning 11 this summer. I still remember everything about his birth and first few weeks of his life like it was yesterday, and those feelings I had during that time. I still can remember how I felt when I heard his heartbeat for the first time. Surprise, awe, but also fear because I knew that nothing was ever going to be the same. However, the dreams and wishes that I immediately developed for my son were also what led me to my decision of adoption.
When the adoptive parents came to meet me and my parents for the first time, I remember we were all very nervous, but it seemed like we instantly took a liking to each other. Our families were a lot alike, and it just seemed like it would be a really good fit. Since Jaxon’s birth, I feel like our relationship has gotten even better, and we have all grown a lot closer. I email and talk with the adoptive mom more than I do some of my girlfriends from college. I consider the adoptive parents to be really great friends of mine, but also as part of my family, like as an extension of my family. And I feel like I’ve become a part of theirs. They’ve opened their hearts and their lives and have let me continue to have a role in Jaxon’s life and see him grow up. I am incredibly grateful for the relationship I have with them and will have with Jaxon as he gets older. The adoptive parents are not only a great example for my son, but also for me. They have helped me to realize the type of person I want to be and what I want out of life. The bond I have with them and the relationship I have with Jaxon is probably my best motivator, and it’s something that I wouldn’t trade for anything.
Working With One of the Best Adoption Agencies
I would recommend Nightlight for many reasons. I was recommended two of the best adoption agencies by a woman’s pregnancy center. When I finally decided to call and get the process going of moving forward with the adoption, I first called another agency, and it being a few days before Christmas I didn’t get an answer. I figured Nightlight, too would have their office closed. I then called Nightlight, just to make sure, and they picked up on the first ring. One of the many reasons I like Nightlight is that they have an “On Call Phone”. Someone in the office ALWAYS has the phone. This was very convenient for me. If I had a question, no matter what time of the day, or night, I would always get an answer, and they were happy to take my calls.
Some other services I was offered was help with anything I needed. They helped me with mortgage payments, my phone bill, and maternity clothes. They also offered to help with groceries and transportation. This was a huge help to me! Maternity clothes are not cheap! When my doctor took me out of work for the pregnancy, the agency helped me figure out how to keep up with my bills. This was such a blessing. As if I couldn’t think of anything else they could possibly do for me, they knew I was not happy with my current job. My pregnancy counselor, Katie, helped me get into a better field, by meeting with me for lunch to fill out the application online. Later when the company called me for the interview, Katie met me for coffee a few days before, and went over interview questions with me and did a mock interview. And because of her help, I aced the interview and I now love my job!!
After placement was when Nightlight most impacted my life. My pregnancy counselor, Katie, told me about a support group called, Birth Mom Buds. She shared about a retreat that they were having in North Carolina. This is where I met Birth Moms from all over the country and made relationships that helped me through the worst days. This retreat helped me to realize I was not alone in this process, and I got so much support from so many women. I still contact these women on a daily basis, and call some of them my best friends! If Katie hadn’t connected me them, I wouldn’t be at peace with the adoption, like I am today. Even long after placement, Katie, still contacts me to see how I am doing, and how my daughter is doing. We’ve gone on many lunch dates, and have enjoyed spending time together. I couldn’t have asked for a better pregnancy counselor.
Shortly after placing, I started to have bad dreams, related to the adoption and placement. Katie quickly found me a counselor to talk to and the agency paid for my sessions. And once again I am back in a good place with the adoption process.
Most importantly why I would recommend this agency is because they did not pressure me as a Birth Mother. I didn’t feel like I was being forced to place my daughter. They kept me well informed on legal matters, and paperwork that would be done in the hospital. I knew exactly what would be happening in the hospital, about what time it would happen, and how to mentally prepare myself. Many times she went over this with me, until I had no questions.
Nightlight was a God Send during my pregnancy. I feel that God truly blessed me with this agency, and he knew what he was doing when they answered the phone. They matched me with the PERFECT family for my needs, and because of them my daughter is being raised in a wonderful Christian home. I couldn’t thank this agency enough for everything they have done for me. I would most certainly recommend Nightlight Christian Adoptions if you’re looking for an agency with Christian moral values, love and support, and wonderful people to work with to make your dreams come true!
Megan’s Story of the Benefits of Open Adoption
This is a story of three strangers who did not know each other but their paths crossed for a very important reason.
Let’s go back to the winter of 2011. I was a twenty-year old working a full-time and part-time job, trying to make ends meet. I didn’t know what I was doing with my life, to be honest what twenty-year old does? When I found out I was pregnant I had so many questions running through my mind: How could I support another human being? How can I be a parent when I am still raising myself? I don’t make enough money!
During the pregnancy something just didn’t feel right, I kept asking myself why did God choose this path for me? Later during that week, I went the free local pregnancy clinic to talk to someone about all my fears. The lady asked, “have you heard of adoption.” And handed me the pamphlet for Nightlight. I had never heard of adoption before but was intrigued and wanted to know more. I knew that I wanted my child to have a better life then I did and I wanted my child to have two parents able to provide everything without worrying how I will make ends meet. That moment right there is when I decided that an open adoption was the best option for my child to have the best life possible.
Meeting the adoptive parents of my child was scary for me, would they like me? Are they going to be judgmental of me being so young and pregnant? Come to find out it was just as scary for them as it was for me. It felt like a first date, where you are trying to find the perfect outfit, make sure your hair and makeup are in order and nervous about if they will like you. After that meeting I knew that they were it! They were the perfect parents for my child.
The hospital experience. This brings me to the most bitter-sweet day I had to experience, the day that my son was leaving me. I never thought that it would have been so painful. As we said our goodbye’s I watched them pack the car with the new baby items, strapped my son in and drove off to start their new life as a family. As they left I had become weak, collapsed to the floor crying my heart out with the feeling that I just let the most precious baby go. I never felt more heart broken and sad in my life but happy at the same time, to help someone else dreams become a reality.
The adoptive parents were so happy to become parents, but they said, “they had felt guilty for taking mother hood from someone else.” In my eyes they never took mother hood away from me, they gave me so much more. Peace, in knowing that they are going to be wonderful parents, knowing that my son will be taken care of and peace in knowing that he will have a better child hood and the best opportunity to succeed in life. They were able to do something that I was not, and I am thankful every day that the they are Ryan’s parents.
I was terrified about what life would be like after giving up my child for adoption. It was hard when I got to visit Ryan. I cried every time on the drive home but as the years go by it did get easier. I receive pictures and handmade items from Ryan, we face time and have a Facebook group for family and friends to see how he is growing. The adoptive parents even invited my family to Ryan’s birthday parties and sports events. How cool is that!
I have been told by family and friends, “How could you give up your own child, they don’t support it and that I am a horrible person.” I had come to realize that not everyone understands and that’s ok. It takes a strong person to let your kid have a better life then what you can provide. I did not give up my child, I gave him the best opportunity to succeed in life and I had gained an amazing family along with it.
Adoption. It’s something that no one talked about back in the day and even still in today’s society it can be “looked down on”, but what people fail to realize is how it can change more than one person’s life for the better.
I gave birth to my boy, “Ducky,” 8 weeks ago today. I have never wanted children and was even on birth control at the time, but some things are just meant to happen. I had always thought about being a surrogate, so it did not take me long to decide that adoption was the right choice. The father was recently divorced with 3 boys and wanted nothing to do with it, so he was out of the picture quickly. I met the adoptive parents and formed a great bond with them almost instantly. They had been trying for over 10 years to have a baby and wanted it so badly.
With every text, phone call, and visit that we had, I could feel their love grow, not only for Ducky, but for me as well. The mom went with me to almost every doctor’s appointment, all the way up to them being there when I delivered. The mom’s face when Ducky came out and cried for the first time will forever be cemented as the greatest image I have ever seen.
I thought it would be easier to keep my distance and to not have much contact with them after birth. However, it started to feel like a breakup. I wasn’t just losing contact with Ducky, but also with new friends that I had shared my most intimate moments with.
Luckily, the parents are open to as much communications I would like and we text at least once a week now. I have never once regretted my decision. I have ended/lost contact with family members, friends, and even coworkers because they simply don’t understand. It’s ok because I know Ducky is loved and wanted and will have the best life possible. In the end, that’s all that really matters.
When the Coronavirus pandemic hit our country, the adoptive family was worried that Jamie would not be able to visit. Then one day we learned about a social distancing visit! In the words of the adoptive mom, “My heart is so happy. Such a bright spot in all this quarantine yuck.”
How My Husband and I Put Up Our Child For Adoption
I would have to start way back when Jacob Farmer was a 17-year-old boy. His body had given out on him while he was laying next to the toilet; coughing up blood. The pain was excruciating causing tears to drape his cheeks. Soon Jacob was rushed to the ER to get checked out. They checked out the huge lump on his chest that had been growing for 15 years. The biopsy showed a tumor had grown in, on and around his rib cage. Surgery was followed quickly after to make sure the tumor didn’t grow cancerous. They cracked his sternum halfway open and took a quarter size bone of the head of the tumor out. The rest remained to wiggle in his chest.
Jacob was doing good all the way up until april 2016 when his body started to collapse on him and he would lie somewhere for hours unable to move. Sometimes I would come home from work and he would be unresponsive. Terrifying times. We went to doctors and he took countless medicines. Nothing was working right. We are currently working on getting his disability so we can be better off financially.
Around March of 2017, we found out I was pregnant. What we had decided was putting up a child for adoption. I wasn’t ready to take care of a child, I had several health issues, Jacob had his health issues, and I wanted to provide for another family who couldn’t bear children. So we got introduced to Nightlight Christian adoptions through life choices. I called up Regina, my case manager, to speak on options and advice. The process started.
Regina was such a sweet and supportive woman. She still is and remains to help others as she did me. Shoot, she still messages me to make sure I’m doing good. I have to say she is such a compassionate sweetheart. Now, this definitely wasn’t easy whatsoever. A lot of paperwork was done. A lot of questions were asked and answered. A lot was done to make sure Jacob and I 100% wanted put up our child for adoption.
I do have to say there were a lot of negative people, including my own family (whom I don’t speak to anymore) who would constantly be rude or negative the whole time toward me. Even to this day I still have awful people who decide they will judge. But no matter what I know I did the right thing because my son is loved, protected, well taken care of, and has an education. All I could ever ask for as a Mommy. Yes, I am a mother. Not going to let someone else tell me anything different. It’s the most selfless and heartfelt decision Jacob and I have ever made.
Now it started off with going through books and deciding on the family we wanted to grow with. We saw Jace and Malery with their 10-year-old boy (who was also adopted). Their life was very similar to ours and even had pets involved. Which in my book is always a plus. Jacob and I finally got to meet them with Regina. We ate and talked for four hours. We wish we could’ve stayed longer because of the amount of stuff we all shared and enjoyed. Jacob’s mom and my father were also very much involved with meeting and conversing with everyone as well.
Now I did have a lot of complications throughout my pregnancy. I started to have actual contractions at 29 weeks and I was constantly dehydrated no matter how many gallons of water I drank. I was hospitalized a lot and gave everyone a scare. We were scared that I and the baby would lose our lives. I was put on bed rest around 30 weeks to make sure everyone was safe. Mind you at this point I was a huge watermelon about ready to burst. I was small and my baby was just way too big for me. Everything was swollen and I had to have help doing everything. Jacob was there the entire time. Making sure I was well taken care of, went to my appointments, bathed me, you name it he did it.
Once we found out I was having a boy I was over the moon. I’ve always wanted a boy. Coming up with the name was a group effort. We all decided on the name Edmund for his first name and Kaziah was picked out from Jacob’s grandmother’s maiden name. It turned out beautifully and I loved it all.
Before we could have a baby shower Edmund decided he wanted to arrive early at 35 weeks. Luckily he came out a healthy baby at 7lbs 8oz and 19in long. He was a chunk baby for sure. So cute and adorable. I had the hardest time sleeping. I just watch him sleep and wake up. He was the most chill baby you could ever meet. I felt so sick because I wasn’t sleeping at all. But luckily once the adoptive mother came I was able to catch a few z’s. Seeing Everyone’s faces light up holding my son made my heartthrob. So beautiful and magical. I never wanted those moments to end.
Once I got home and all the process of giving my rights away hit me like a rock. I would cry all the time and sleep all the time. I was a mess and just wanted to hold my baby boy. But I also knew he was well taken care of. I went to therapy for Postpartum Disorder. So I was granted the wish to gain an emotional support animal. The night before I was going to receive my papers Jacob and his best friend stumbled upon a kitty stuck in a tree. It was a true miracle given to me. We eventually named the kitty Shiva. To this day he loves playing with his brother Khan (who is a 4-year-old grumpy cat). They get along great!
To this day I still receive pictures, videos, updates on him, and We even do yearly visits. Edmund is now 2 and super healthy and well-loved. Time flies and it blows my mind even to this day of how much has changed in my life for the better. I will love Edmund, his brother, and the adoptive parents who take such good care for our precious boy. This is my story to tell and I hope to inspire others!
an Quotes From Birth Moms
“I think it was the best choice I made in my life and the most unselfish thing to do. It was nothing of bravery but just out of love for my son to have the best. I am so thankful he has a loving and beautiful family to share every special moment with him.” – a brave birthmother
“I just wanted to make sure you knew how special you made this process for me. I will never forget you and how much you went above and beyond. I could not be more pleased with my experience as a birthmother with you and the agency. This is a highly emotional and challenging time for me and you all helped ease the pain and made the transition feel very natural. I am truly grateful that I was guided to you all. I would whole-heartedly recommend your services to others. Thank you!” – a brave birthmother
“I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything you and everyone there did for me! I am blessed God opened my eyes and showed me true love through your agency and I share my story to all kinds of people (I owe that to you as a pregnancy counselor). HUGE THANK YOU!” – a brave birthmother
“I’m so glad he’s got the life I wanted my baby to have. I know the Lord put us on each other’s paths for a good reason. We couldn’t have been blessed even more. I thank the Lord that I made the right decisions for him and the parents I chose to raise him. They’re doing the best job and giving him things that I know I would’ve never been able to give him. He is truly blessed with wonderful people. And for that all my pain I feel not having him in my life, his happiness means even more to me. I’m greatly appreciative that they still think of me as well.” – a brave birthmother
“I really appreciate all that you and the kind staff have done for me and my baby girl. The way you handled the placement process impacted my life, and helped me make the transition into a kind and compassionate adulthood. I’m still standing strong after all these years because of the help and counseling I received from you. So I really wanted to take time out of my day to send my thanks and love. During the adoption process, while I was still attending school, there were many girls struggling with their pregnancies, and some didn’t realize placing was an option. Many of them could have used the care I was given, so if it means helping future unplanned parents understand that they have many options, and don’t have to go it alone– it would mean a great deal to me. It’s a real blessing in my life to have met the adoptive family and their beautiful family. I have no regrets with the decision I made, even if it was an incredibly hard one. I sleep very well at night knowing that my baby girl is safe and happy.” – a brave birthmother
“I liked that my pregnancy counselor was there for me when I felt that I couldn’t talk to many people about what was going on.” – a brave birthmother
“I liked how understanding everyone was. I felt cared for and supported by the entire staff. I felt informed of all my options, and I liked hearing what others had chosen, because I’d never done this before and it helped me understand.” – a brave birthmother
“I wanted to say thank you. Thank you for just being you. You have helped me and I know so many others.” – a brave birthmother
“Hi, my name is Ashley and I actually placed with you guys last week. So things are still fresh. But I wanted to let you know my pregnancy counselor made this experience the most pleasant it could be for me. I thank her and the adoption agency for that. It was the hardest decision I’ve ever made in my life, but the correct one. I couldn’t have picked better adoptive parents and I know they love my baby girl as if she were their own. Thank you guys for holding my hand and reassuring me the whole way through this and then some. I’ve been doing better emotionally and from the pictures I have received so far, the baby is doing great, and they are a happy, beautiful family. It’s nice to know that people and places, such as this adoption agency, are helping women and families the way you are, that are out there to give young women and troubled women out there a better choice. Thank you all. God bless and may you all have a good year filled with joy and many blessings.” – Ashely, a brave birthmother
“The people working here are AMAZING. no words to describe how beautiful the work they do is.
Shout out to Allison! she went above and beyond for my babies, for me and for the parents adopting- who are now MY family. ♡ highly recommend Nightlight Christian Adoptions!”
– a brave birthmother
“I love the Greer office they have helped me pick a wonderful family for a child I couldn’t give the best life to. I get to talk to the birth parents and get weekly updates in my wonderful daughter I have found a new family I didn’t know I needed and a great friend in Nicole and they honestly want to see everything work out great.”
– a brave birthmother
“What a blessing Nightlight has been!
Adoption is a journey, not a sprint. And Nightlight is there with you from the very start and they are committed for the long haul. They deeply love their birth moms and truly want what is best for them and their baby! They are committed to adoptive families – equipping us with the education and support we need to be awesome adoptive parents!
We love that they have a Christian basis for their goals and actions – when you’re grounded in Christ’s love you can shine a light even in the darkest, hardest times. And Nightlight truly sparkles!”
– a brave birthmother
“Nightlight Christian Adoptions’ staff is warm, caring, and professional. They care deeply for birth mothers, and they treat them with respect. We have adopted three times through this adoption agency, and they have done an exceptional job helping us navigate the uncertainties that accompany any adoption. We’re so thankful that Nightlight is part of our family story!”
– a brave birthmother
“When I found myself facing an unplanned pregnancy, it was a scary situation. After a lot of thinking, I made the decision to place for adoption. While I knew that this was the best decision, it was also a new situation. I was nervous. Katy got into contact with me. She was absolutely amazing. She made me feel so comfortable. I never once felt judged, or disrespected. If I had a question or concern… Katy had an answer or resolution. Very promptly I might add. The adoption process is stressful. I’m just extremely grateful I had Katy by my side.”
– a brave birthmother
“As a birth mother seeking options for the future of my baby and my family I came across this amazing adoption agency. I was quickly put in touch with Katie, who made me feel so worthy and welcome and valid in a situation that made me feel otherwise. She welcomed me with love and grace. I highly recommend Nightlight for their services and amazing, amazing staff!”
– a brave birthmother
“We are so incredibly thankful for our adoption agency! They do such wonderful things for birth mothers, babies and waiting families, from their care and counseling to their commitment in doing what is right, safe and healthy for everyone involved. The way they facilitate open adoption is just amazing, they break down every stigma and are able to really show how loving and healthy it can be. They truly have a heart for birth mothers and are able to cater to their physical and emotional needs in a safe and non-judgmental environment. This agency is truly a light in this world!”
– a brave birthmother
“Finding myself pregnant 9 years ago, I was coming out of a horrible lifestyle and working on changing it. It was a very confusing time in my life, and to add an unplanned pregnancy on top of it made it that much more confusing. I went through this agency as a birthmother, and I highly recommend them. They were so supportive and understanding of my needs and wants. They were even supportive after the birth and adoption was complete. I can’t imagine better support and care that could have been given. My son’s family is incredible and I get to see him grow up and see how happy he is. Choosing adoption is not an easy decision, but with this agency, I knew it was the right one.”
– a brave birthmother
“Nightlight helped me through a really rough time when I didn’t know what I was going to do. Megan met with me right away and helped me to get a new ID and some other things that I needed and helped me sort through what I was thinking and feeling about my situation. I formed a great relationship with my pregnancy counselor, Leah, who was with me and supporting all along the way. I ended up finding a great family who made me feel comfortable and cared for and I still have ongoing contact with them.”
– a brave birthmother
“This place is absolutely amazing I used this adoption agency when trying to find a family for my son and they are so sweet they are very understanding they work with you through every step they make sure that you have everything you need and they are absolutely wonderful they really are I give them 5 out of 5 because they are absolutely great and I would definitely 110% recommend them.”
– a brave birthmother
“This adoption agency provided all my needs. I’m a very emotional type of person but Julie was so patient with me. I was homeless and they immediately put me in a place. The couple kept their word and continues sending pics and updates which I look forward too. I highly recommend this adoption agency. I went through another that treated me awful. Thank God for the entire staff they are a true blessing.”
– a brave birthmother